My Sun Moon and Stars
by Weeping Roses
Summary: Bella's POV Post Eclipse, Edward changes Bella, so What happened to Jacob, and what happens when she sees her best friend again? Can Bella truly part with everything she left behind?My first fanfic! Any criticism from you amazing writers would be an honor
1. Chapter One: Things Left Behind

"Are you sure about this, Love?" Edward said wearily.

Trees and clouds whizzed past in a blur. Edward gripped the steering wheel tighter, pushing Alice's bright yellow porche to 120 mph. I was used to Edward speed, so it wasn't his driving that caused the shiver that ran down my spine.

"Bella?" his voice was unsteady though he was trying to hide it.

I was also trying to hide how I felt at the moment, if Edward were to look over at my face to see my reaction, he would see the fear in my eyes. He would definitely turn the car around right now and head straight back to Forks.

I attempted to keep my tone steady, "Yes...I..I'm sure."

uh..now I had to go about this a whole different way, he had heard my voice crack.

The car screeched to a stop as he veered off the road. A cloud of dust swirled around us.

"Bella, we don't have to do this. We can turn around right now, and, and go back home, and you can think about it for a few months and then..."

His excited tone snapped me back into attention. "No! no...I'll be fine Edward, honest, I want to do this."

I was trembling visibly, with fear and anticipation. This didn't seem to help the situation at all. I could tell he was already too nervous for me to make it any worse. Reaching across the seat, he unbuckled my seat belt and lifted me effortlessly into his arms. Holding me there he began to kiss the hollow of my throat. I shivered, moving my lips to his. They were cold and they molded against mine softly as his hands brushed through me hair and then moved them down over my hands. Twining his fingers with mine, he pulled me protectively closer to his marble-like body. And then leaning back slightly, he met my gaze with his. The moment seemed to last forever as his liquid topaz eyes pierced my surface, attempting desperately to dazzle me one last time. It was working; I watched his face with sadness, he was so flawlessly beautiful and concerned. I lay my head against his chest and rested there. Genuine fear rippled through me as I thought of the obstacles that lay ahead. I will have to leave Forks, Washington, maybe forever. This place has become my home and I will miss it, everything about it, from the canopies of moss to the rain, especially our meadow, and the old Cullen house. I will probably never see Charlie or Renee again. I would be too tempted to kill them, and by the time I'll have learned enough self control…well…" I tried hard to force the thoughts out of my mind, but they bombarded the walls and soon I was panicking.

"I would never see Jake again, he will never be my friend after this, in fact..." I shuddered "we will be mortal enemies." I fought back tears as I pictured his face, the face that I loved, the face that I would always love. Jacob, my Jacob, grinning his mischivous little grin that I had grown to adore. His eyes soft and burning, like embers in the dark. I will never forget the night I first met my best friend. We were at that bonfire, and the Quilloites were telling those wonderful stories that they all knew by heart. Poor Jake, I had tricked him into telling me everything that night, breaking the treaty, and betraying his ancestors. All at once the memories came flooding back. Jacob stealing me away at the prom, we danced to that one song." The melody hummed in the back of my head. "Jacob holding onto me as I sobbed uncontrollably into his shoulder. Jacob pushing our bikes out of his garage for the first time, "So are we going to ride or what?" and hugging him that day, he was so warm...so very warm. Jacob and I walking along the beach in La Push, "I'm in love with you. Bella, I love you, and I want you to pick me instead of him." Jacob being sick with the "fever", and being away from him for weeks, what that had felt like, it felt like..." I didn't want to think about it. "Jacob when he was first initiated into the pack, "Go home Bella, we can't hang out anymore." He had really hurt me that day, but he made it up later that night by sneaking in my bedroom window, "Im trying to keep--"he huffed, "my promise!" He had kept his promise, he had saved me from the emotional hell that I had been living, Jacob saving my life from Laurent, Jacob saving me from freezing to death, telling me that he wanted to die, Jacob striding towards me and kissing me...me kissing him..." The hot tears flowed down my cheeks, I could not stop them now, the memories were too painful. Jacob in the hospital bed, "I am exactly right for you Bella. It would have been effortless for us--comfortable, easy as breathing...He's like a drug for you, Bella. I can see that you can't live without him now. It's too late, But I would have been healthier for you. Not a drug; I would have been the air, the sun." I head my own voice echoing, "The worst part is that I saw the whole thing--our whole life. And I want it bad Jake, I want it all. I want to stay right here and never move. I want to love you and make you happy. And I can't Jake and its killing me." finally, he ran away without even a goodbye, he couldn't take it anymore, after all this time I had never been a good friend to him, I had only caused him pain.

Somewhere in Northern Canada, my Jacob was all alone. Sam had heard from him earlier this week to tell the pack that he was alive, but not ready to come home. I reminded myself to thank Sam for calling me. He was so far away meet again, the first time in years maybe. There he was, my Jacob, overwhelmed with joy to see me after all this time…he ran towards me, open armed and grinning my favorite Jacob smile. He stopped 10 feet in front of me. Maybe he could smell me…who knows if that whole smell prejudice is real. The daydream continued. "Bella?" His face was wrought with confusion. He looked around. And then…realization hit. His face fell. He was hurt more than anything, not angry or disgusted, but hurt. "Bella…I…you…why!" He chocked out. I could only watch him, wishing I could cry too. He dropped to his knees and shook with anguish. He wept, howling in pain as he had the night he overheard Edward and me talking about our engagement. "Bella! Please no! GOD!! NOO! Bells, ple e ea s se!"

The image left me, and there I was again, in the arms of my true love. Brushing the tears from my eyes, I looked up at his face; he was watching me for any sign of weakness. "I love him more than I love anything else in this life and the next" I thought. More images dashed through my mind. "What if the blood lust drives me to love Edward less? I would be so strong and full of rage and what if…I hurt someone…someone in my new family…Alice, or Jasper" My heart sank. "Emmet, or Rosalie, Carlisle or Esme. What if I _killed_ someone…they'd be so concentrated on protecting me…especially Edward…" My heart stopped. "Could he protect himself from me?

"Bella?" It was Edward this time. "Are you sure about this?" I took a deep break and exhaled my fear. As convincingly as I could I said "I'm sure, Edward. I'm ready."


	2. Chapter Two: Pleasure

Chapter One: A Life Left Behind

Chapter Two: Pleasure

Edward called Carlisle into the kitchen where we stood. Two steps behind him were Alice and Jasper. Behind them, Esme, Emmet and Rosalie. Instantly I felt the calm beckon me into its arms. I looked with gratitude at Jasper, he nodded in encouragement. Edward lifted me effortlessly into his arms and carried me up the stairs, Carlisle and the family followed close behind. "Which room would you like to do this in Bella?" Carlisle asked. I thought for a moment, then said, "Edward's room...I..I mean _our_ room." It was funny to think that we were married already; I looked down at my finger to stare at the glistening diamond ring that sat there. Looking up again I said, "I want the room I'm in to bring me comfort, and I know that I will find comfort in being surrounded by Edward's things." Edward smiled weakly and kissed me on the forehead. We walked down the hallway passing both Alice and Jasper's room and Carlisle and Esme's room. Setting me down on the hardwood floor Carlisle asked "Would you prefer us to leave Bella?" "Could we just have a few minutes before we do this...?" I said leaning on Edward's shoulder. "Of course" he replied shooing the family out of the room. Emmet poked his head in and made a smooching face at the both of us, earning him a smack on the head from an exasperated Rosalie who then gave me an apologetic look and closed the door behind them.

Edward turned to me and immediately his lips were on mine. He pulled me into his icy grasp, pressing me into his torso. I wrapped my arms around his neck and straddled him. Twining my hands in his hair and kissing him. His lips were urgent and far from gentle. He cradled me in his lap and held me tight. The heat in my stomach rose and fell with the intensity. He pulled away and grinning devilishly, lay me down on the bed. I remembered the very first time we had done this, on our wedding night; it had been so magical then. We were so carefree and happy. Now we had precious little time left for it to be this way, me a human and him a vampire who had to be careful not to crush me. His eyes turned black with lust. Leaning in slowly he began kissing me. My lips, down to my neck, down to my chest in straight lines and then back up again. His cold hands found their way to my buttons without breaking the kiss. I began sucking on his bottom lip. He undid each button extra slowly, as though trying to savor every second, pressing in harder and deepening the kiss with each button. When he had them all undone, he slid it off my arms. Eyeing his next target, I removed my pink lace bra for him, unable to wait any longer. He gasped and ripped his own shirt off. His muscles were astonishing, I never got used to how beautiful he is. I began to massage his shoulders, and then moved down to tracing my fingers over his abdomen, sucking gently on his neck. Reaching for his belt I unhooked it and slid it out of the belt loops. He unzipped his pants and pressed his weight into me kissing me hard and fast. I gasped for air and then, reaching down unzipped and wrenched my own jeans off. Panting, he slid two fingers inside my lace panties and worked them inside of me. Pulling them in and out, I moaned and dug my nails into his back, pulling myself closer. I came and then he slipped me out of my panties and removed his boxers revealing his god-like manhood. He always reminded me of the statue of David when he was completely naked like this. He pressed himself inside of me and wrapped his arms underneath me. He thrust hard and fast until we came at the same time. I cried out his name, and kissed him fiercer. "Bella" he moaned. I slid my hands down touching him and sliding them up and down. He bucked against my hands and then he let out a huge sigh as he came. While he was lying there, I climbed up to get on top of him. Positioning myself just below his groin, I leaning in and kissed his muscular chest. I sucked gently down to his abs, and then I kissed a trail down his stomach to his groin. Stopping there, I teased him, kissing all along his upper thighs and inner leg. Smooching once or twice just above. "Bella Please! Please..!!" he moaned I grinned, I knew he wanted me as much as I wanted him, and I needed to make this special, it was my final human experience. I took him in my mouth and began sucking as soft and slow as I could, and then a bit harder as he clenched the sheets of his bed. Then, taking full control I sucked him as hard and fast as my tongue would take me before he came. He sighed in ecstasy. Then, when the pleasure had subsided, he eyed me devilishly, "That too cruel, Mrs. Cullen" I winked at him in attempts to be seductive and pretended to crawl off the bed. In less than a second his arms were around me, he pinned me to the bed and began sucking on my breasts, making circles around my nipples with his tongue. He licked me down my stomach to my lower abdomen and then paused for a second before licking the skin around and between my clit. It was too much to bear, I cried out and panted heavily onto his neck, but he did not give in. He took me all the way there, and then watching me release in complete ecstasy he lay down next to me, putting my head on his shoulder. "I love you Bella Cullen...so so much." Edward said, his words filled sadness and joy all at once. "I will love you for all eternity Edward Cullen." I said letting him know that I was not giving in. He leaned over the side of the bed and grabbed the set of silk pajamas Alice had set out for me. "She thinks of everything" I laughed. I changed quickly and Edward remade the bed with new sheets so that it would be comfortable or me to sleep in. Stepping into a pair of sweats and a white tee shirt, he took my hand, squeezed it tight, and then opened our bedroom door and calling down the spiral stairs said, "Carlisle, we're ready!"


End file.
